لدي أمل

بيانات اضافيه [ + ]

رقم العضوية : 30500  تاريخ التسجيل :  05 2010  أخر زيارة : 21-01-2016 (10:33 AM)  المشاركات : 675 [ + ]  التقييم :  40

لوني المفضل : Cadetblue

No theres nothing... I'm over. doubt I will have anymore existence

Memories tons that feel like they aren't just memories but they all just happened on the top of the list is a violent sexual memory the happened through a friend of 9 yrs was more than a sister this wasn't too long ago... deceiving and strange how people change and can be so evil..

Cruel cold mean family (FATHER).. I would LOVE literally to live on the street instead of with them

HEALTH... they say my situation is actually really bad and something could happen but they wont hospitalize me and the medical system is trash..

I ate my first tiny mean very late last night otherwise the last time before that was on Friday!!! I'm very dehidrated but wont give me fluids in the blood even though I can barely even drink just barely sips of water... ZERO to barely any sleep over a month

High blood pressure reaching the highest according to my memory 177/110 and untreated and they refuse because according to my symptoms they think that there is something wrong with my kidneys which is core explanation for the BP and the stomach issues so if they treat the dehydration the blood preasure will go up than they think a complication will happen to my kidneys which they think has an issue but there not sure and they send me home as I am and l me to follow up in the outpatient and the outpatient oppointments are at least a month away.. The ER do nothing and if you push they fight and say go to the outpatient and they outpatient says wait at least a month to two months Ridiculous... Are they kidding me.. and the ER say is actually dangerous to have your fast big weight loss conteniuing with the symtoms your talking especially if it's long term so you seriously need to get the closest meeting with a doctor and the other say wait and you get angry and still get no where

not to mention your father getting in the way acting like he cares out of no where when he has been shouting at you over a month when ever you say u need to go to the doctor saying oh nothings wrong with you no living the house

so I thought maybe he is willing to change is he is believing that theres something... We go and he ends up fight shouting loud at me in public in the hospitail making people saying things like you are a mentally disturbed person... than walking away and from far in the hall way shouting when you get home I am taking your car keys away and will have another way with you

I've done nothing to deserve this... no treatment no nothing no freedon no sleep no rest no food no water no peace of house personal room or mind from anything

I broke down again yesterday in front of my mom hysterical ing and they issues with breathing like a panic attack losing my mind very stressed tired overwhelmed feeling sverly preasured

you know what she does!!!?? She says I need to leave I'm going to be late I have an oppiontment of dying my hair!!!!!!!!!!!1 go to get dressed and leaves you home alone

after about an hour you push yourself to go out to do things you father will kill you if u don''t cause he has been pushing and he cares about is a job.. so your alone when you shouldn't been driving tired and fuzzy thinking and you feel you are going to faint and you send a message to your mother ling her by the way I am feeling very sick nauseous and faint... She calls much later than before hearing what she have to say she saying oh I need to hang up busy with something getting her hair done!!!!

so I am home no fathers outside and will leave again before he comes and really does take my keys away... I will try with the hospital one more type...

Otherwise I think I hd enough and I don't see anything to be breathing for... extremely hurt FRUSTRATED angry pressured....the list can continue

Theres more than was mentioned too... Today is it I've been suffering for quit a while and today is the day where i just cannot handle it anymore

Don't know what to do extremely depressed losing my mind I'm in very bad mental state